


The Geometry Job

by Idle wild (NienteZero), NienteZero



Category: Leverage
Genre: F/M, First Threesome, First Time, Getting Together, Half-Assed Attempts at Safer Sex Practices, M/M, Mostly Pwp, Multi, Not Great Communication Before Getting Sexy, OT3, Season 5 Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-26
Updated: 2013-03-26
Packaged: 2017-12-06 13:22:56
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,389
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/736167
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NienteZero/pseuds/Idle%20wild, https://archiveofourown.org/users/NienteZero/pseuds/NienteZero
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hardison will never stop being surprised by the things his girl comes up with. Like a cunning plan to keep the hitter close to home. With lots of sex. Because Parker sees everything like a puzzle piece and rotates it until it fits. Preferably between her and Hardison, in bed.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Geometry Job

**Author's Note:**

> This is set early/mid season five after Parker and Hardison declare themselves as a couple, but before the Rundown Job. The fist bump between Hardison and Eliot when Parker does her laser-beam avoiding gymnastics is my "QED they are all totally doing it" moment.

"We should have sex with Eliot."

Hardison was sleepy in the afterglow of a gymnastically adventurous hour with Parker, so it took him a minute to process the words that had come out of his girl's mouth. Which was good, because his reflexive reaction was hurt that she'd want to be with someone else. But they'd never talked exclusivity, and there was always more going on in that squirrelly brain of hers than the obvious.

"Huh, why's that, baby girl?" he said, as calmly as he could, pulling Parker close in to him so she wouldn't freak out and think that he was mad at her.

"Well I've got you, and Nate and Sophie have whatever, and Eliot doesn't have anyone who knows him to be with. And he likes us, so we should have sex with him! He needs to be glued on better."

Glued on better. Hardison parsed the phrase. That'd be like Parker. She didn't seem to see sex like other people saw it. It still seemed to baffle her that he could make her feel so many things just by touching her.

"What makes you think he'd want to have sex with us?" he asked.

Parker wriggled in his arms until she could look at him, and she had a look of mischief on her face, lighting her eyes up.

"I know something you don't know!" she sing-songed.

"Apparently."

"Well, he obviously really likes us. He hugs you all the time and he doesn't hug anyone! And he's trying to help fix me, which he doesn't have to do."

Hardison sighed. He wished his beautiful, smart, crazy woman didn't think she was broken. She wasn't. Strange, but a kind of strange that made her wonderful. He tried to make sure she knew she was perfect in his eyes just as she was. But he did see how Eliot patiently took the time to try to help when she wanted to understand better how other people saw the world, coaching her through with a patience unusual to him.

"Also," Parker wrinkled her nose and continued, "he has sex with people he doesn't really even know, let alone like as much as he likes us. If he'll have sex with them, then he should definitely want to do it with us."

"That's not really how it works." Hardison said. But he could feel that the whole thing was a lost cause. When Parker had an idea in her head, it was almost impossible to dislodge it. And Eliot might be tough and might play cool and distant, but Parker had him wrapped around her little finger.

It really did make his stomach twist to think his girl wanted to sleep with someone else. Sure, Eliot was the man. You'd have to be blind not to notice that he was built like a greek god, and that he had a physical grace rivaling Parker's own. So Hardison couldn't blame Parker for that, or for thinking of ways to bind Eliot tighter to their weird little pseudo-family.

"I get it, babe," he said, "But I've never seen Eliot with a man, so I don't know if he'd be up for a threesome. But I get it if you want to, you know... if you feel like..."

The thought of Eliot and Parker having something without him made Hardison feel intensely lonely. But if it was what his girl needed then maybe he could handle it. Even if it hurt like this.

The next thing that Hardison knew, Parker had pulled herself out from his arms and had him pinned between her thighs, straddling him.

"Hardison, you're such an idiot sometimes!" she said. "I don't want to have sex with Eliot if you aren't there. I don't want to have sex with anyone without you! You make it good, and you're my - my Hardison." Her lips were pouty, but her eyes still held their gleam of trouble. That was the end of meaningful conversation for some very pleasant time.

The next week was awkward. There was a job, and everything went the usual way - an immaculate plan, a reversal of fortune, a hail-Mary-pass that counted on each of them being the best at what they did, a client vindicated, revenge secured. But the whole time Hardison couldn't stop himself from looking at Eliot more than he should. More than once Eliot had turned to him with an irritated "What?"

It was just that - it was just two things. One thing was that now that Parker brought up the thought of Eliot in bed with them, Hardison started to think about it, think about stuff he wasn't comfortable with noticing in another guy. He felt thrown off, like when he first started to notice girls. Which had always been a safer bet than noticing guys. 

The voice that said, "Hey, see the quarterback over there? I gotta tell you, I've got some tingly feelings and woah better hold a book in front of _that_." was jammed away in a locked box to which he'd swallowed the key. High school had been dangerous enough without that complication. But thanks to Parker the little voice had performed a Houdini and was informing Hardison that in fact, he'd noticed Eliot right from when Eliot had saved his life during the double-cross job for Dubenich. It turned out, now he was admitting stuff to himself, he'd noticed Eliot's smart mouth and the core of something good in him that was apparently waiting for Nate to bring it out, and how his ass looked in jeans. And now the voice would not shut up about that smile and how awesome it felt to be the one who made Eliot show it.

The second thing was also Parker's fault. Not only did Hardison have a second run at the joy of adolescent awkwardness going on, but he could totally see what Parker meant about wanting to glue Eliot on tighter. It was because Eliot had already changed since they first met. That's what did it. Because he was so much one of them, looking for the people who would hold onto him and give him a reason to stay on their side of a very skinny ethical line. And Eliot might look to Nate for approval, but where he fit was snugly between Hardison and Parker. Once Hardison started noticing what Parker was talking about, he could see how she felt like Eliot damn well ought to be theirs, his and Parker's.

Parker wasn't shy about taking things she wanted to have. If she could have got Eliot by dangling from the ceiling and slipping him into her pocket, she would have.

After the job was done, Nate and Sophie wandered off behaving like two teenagers, and Hardison wrangled the others to his very favorite Portland safe house for dinner. Sitting in the lounge that flowed off a kitchen that Hardison _might_ have equipped with Eliot in mind, Parker was poking at Eliot's bruises, and Eliot was growling and snapping like a cranky puppy.

About ten pokes in to Parker's curious monkey routine, Eliot stopped paying attention to her and stalked over to where Hardison was tidying up some legal loose ends on the computer, slouched on the couch with his wireless keyboard in his lap.

"You wanna tell me what got up your ass this week?" Eliot said, leaning over Hardison. It was the only time he had a height advantage, although Hardison wasn't stupid enough to think that being taller than Eliot would ever let him win any sort of fight.

Actually, it was kind of hot having Eliot lean over him like that. Except for the part where ... well, Eliot wouldn't kill him for thinking that, because the dude was not a 'phobe, but it'd be awkward.

Thankfully, Parker was there to make the situation perfectly awkward all on her own account. She bounced over the back of the sofa to sit beside Hardison and blurted out, "Oh, we were talking about how we should have sex with you. That's why Hardison's been checking out your ass."

Eliot went totally still. Like, terrifying special forces trained sniper still. Hardison wanted to babble out some sort of excuse or disclaimer or something, but he was too busy taking a mental inventory of his heart and his bladder to make sure nothing had exploded with the sheer intensity of Eliot's gaze.

"That what you both want?" Eliot said.

They hadn't actually talked about it more after the first confusing conversation. Hardison wasn't totally sure about Parker's motivations. But her motivations for most things weren't like other people's. And of all her choices, Eliot would never, ever hurt her.

"Could be fun." Hardison said, trying to keep his tone even. "It doesn't have to be... I mean, not that I'm saying I _was_ checking out your ass because-"

"You like having sex!" Parker interrupted, getting up in Eliot's face. "And you like us, and we like you. So you should totally have sex with us."

"There's something wrong with you." Eliot growled, but it sounded fond, and like home, not like he was dissing Hardison's girl. "I'm going to get a beer."

"Beer. Yes. Beer good. Beer foamy." Hardison said, scrambling off the couch. In deference to Eliot's palate, he had bottled beer in the fridge while he worked the kinks out of his own efforts. The brewpub still had the old owner's recipes on tap, but pride forbade him from serving those.

The problem was that none of them were talented at small talk. Parker sometimes practiced, in her efforts to be more normal, and more versatile in the crew. But Hardison would find himself talking about things that the others didn't have a frame of reference for, and Eliot, well, he just wasn't a big talker unless there was a good reason. So there was beer, but the chit-chat that would have helped smooth over the awkwardness was absent.

But even just standing around drinking beer, with Parker squirreling around in the cupboards to see if there were any snacks she wanted to steal, the totally awkward silence eased out into something more companionable, and then Eliot broke it with, "So, you like my ass?"

Hardison choked on his beer and Eliot thumped his back.

"It's a very nice ass." Parker said, backing out from the floor level cupboard that she was convinced was Hardison's hiding place for strawberry pocky. "If it was on a statue in a museum, I'd steal it. The statue, not just the ass. It'd take too long to chisel an ass off a statue. I'm good, but not that good." She paused. "No, actually, I am that good, but I think I'd still rather have a whole statue, not just statue ass."

"I mean, I'm not saying I was looking, but if I was looking, yeah, my baby's right, it's a fine ass." Hardison said, working his nerve up, the words catching in his throat on the way out. 

Eliot stepped toward Hardison and looked him up and down in a way that made Hardison feel scorched down to the bare bone. 

"Only fair I get to look, too," he said. He turned the same gaze on Parker. Hardison couldn't tell how Parker felt about it, but he knew he was unexpectedly turned on at seeing that, at seeing Eliot look at his girl that way. It could be so hot, the three of them in bed with Parker in the middle.

Eliot took another step forward, a stalking cat, all predator, in a way that made Hardison's mouth turn dry. If Eliot was just putting this on so he could make a joke of it, tear Hardison down later, then his acting skills surpassed Sophie's. But it felt real, like maybe they really were going to do this. Hardison wished he had some more idea of what was going to happen next than the threesomes he'd seen in porn. Because that shit was hot but did not explain things like how everyone knew where the hell their hands were supposed to be at any given moment.

How it was possible that Parker read Eliot better than anyone else was a question for another time. But she seemed to have, because Eliot didn't seem disgusted or appalled by the thought of falling into bed with them. Probably it's just that he was such a man of the world. He'd been places and seen things Hardison couldn't imagine, so being propositioned like this was maybe not that shocking.

Parker clapped her hands together with a sweet, bright grin. "He's going to say yes! You are, aren't you?"

Eliot sighed. "Probably should talk about this some more. You sure you both want this?"

"Yeah, man." Hardison said, trying to sound assured.

"Yes! Stop wasting time!" Parker said.

Eliot rolled his eyes in Hardison's direction at Parker's impatience with anything that wasn't important to her. Then with that stunning speed and grace of his, he had Parker swung over his shoulder and was striding toward the bedroom.

"Coming?" he asked.

Eliot was already through the door to the bedroom before Hardison was half way across the room. He could just shout something reassuring through the door about how they should have fun, and they didn't need to worry about him, and take off. He could see the two of them together, and wasn't it a pretty thought? Eliot's compact, strong body moving over Parker's lithe paleness? What the heck did they need him for?

They were probably just including him because it was the right thing to do. How long had Parker been watching Eliot that closely anyway? If she was tired of Hardison, that was, that would just suck, but he could be too much for some people, and maybe she just wanted someone more... more everything Eliot was that Hardison wasn't.

Hardison's train of thought was broken by a call from the bedroom.

"Hardison, quit fucking around out there."

The rough tone of Eliot's voice was suddenly one of the sexiest things Hardison had ever heard. He was going to be well and truly screwed if he got horny at the sound of Eliot being his usual bossy little asshole. He attempted a casual saunter through the doorway into the bedroom, sticking his hands in his pockets because right now he just didn't know what to do with them, and everyone didn't even have their clothes off yet.

Eliot had dumped Parker on the bed, and she was lying with her chin propped up on her hands watching as he stripped down efficiently, revealing more skin than he usually showed.

(Except that somehow Hardison knew every inch of that skin. Because he hadn't meant to be looking but apparently he'd been looking, thank you very much, subconscious.)

"Ooh, now Hardison's wearing too many clothes!" Parker said. "Take them off!"

She sounded giddy and imperious at the same time. She was looking at him like he was the last painting at an auction, her pink tongue sticking out from between her teeth. That was one thing about being with Parker. She made Hardison feel like he was worthy of avarice.

He pulled the scarf from around his neck, making a show of tossing it aside like a stripper. Eliot might be all lean, mean, efficient stripping machine, but Hardison had style. He unbuttoned his shirt, one pearly button at a time, raising his lashes to peer at Parker teasingly through them between buttons.

He wasn't expecting the lateral attack from Eliot.

"Quit screwing around and get naked."

There was a bundle of potential energy on the verge of becoming kinetic right up in his face and tugging the shirt so the buttons pinged off.

"Ooh!" Parker said, "hot!"

"Babydoll, now you're the one who needs to take something off." Hardison said, his voice not at its steadiest.

Parker contorted herself into a series of yogic positions starting with downward dog in an effort to take her clothes off without actually bothering to get out of the bed.

Eliot and Hardison were both transfixed by this view. It would be rude not to stop and stare as she curled one leg up over her back with her toes pointing toward her head so that she could reach the cuff of her jeans to pull them off.

Eliot was apparently just an all around hands-on kind of guy. He finished getting Hardison's shirt off him and moved behind Parker on the bed, helping her to wriggle out of her jeans.

That was almost too much visual stimulation for Hardison. Eliot had clearly been going commando because now he was behind Hardison's girlfriend, totally naked, and, well. Hardison really hadn't spent a lot of time looking at other guy's dicks on purpose except that there was all the porn. But there was this whole other dick in the room now, and the whole "Hey maybe I'm only, uh, 90% straight" thing was no longer theoretical.

Okay, so to be fair, if Captain Jack Harkness had ever shown up and swirled his coat at Hardison, Hardison totally would have made out with him, even before this little identity crisis. But that was Jack Harkness. Captain Jack was any straight guy's free pass, right? And yeah, it obviously wasn't a big deal if Hardison wasn't totally straight. Dudes made assumptions all the time because of how he dressed and the way he used words that were outside of their vocabularies and it had never especially bothered him. He'd even played gay with Eliot for a con and that had just been damn funny. So why should this be tweaking him?

And also, hey, Parker was right there with Eliot peeling her elaborately zippered bodysuit off her, so this whole thing could be totally about Parker and neither he or Eliot would have to worry about the 'too many dicks on the dance floor' problem.

He quickly finished stripping off his own pants and went to join in the Parker disrobing. Not that there was much left to do. Just those plain black cotton bikini panties she preferred, and the tight stretch of sports bra over her small breasts. It always hit Hardison with a wash of fondness when he saw her practical underwear. That was his girl. She didn't need lace or spangles, she just needed to be able to do her awesome thing. That was hot, and really perfect.

Hardison climbed onto the bed next to Eliot, sitting with his back resting on the pillows. Parker's feet were toward him, and he swung one leg over so that his knees were on either side of hers. She wriggled over onto her back, looking up at her boyfriend and their best friend. Her next move was a hip bridge on one leg. She made it look effortless as she reached around underneath herself to undo the back fastening of her sports bra. She pointed the foot that wasn't holding her up on the bed at Hardison. 

"Little help here?"

He got the picture and leaned over her to pull her underpants down, and off, Parker switching legs easily mid bridge so that he could slide the underpants all the way off and toss them aside.

It never got old, seeing his girl like this, relaxed and unguarded in front of him. There were so many favorite things about their life together, their sex life together, but damned if he didn't just want to get his face in her pussy and watch her go crazy. 

Now came the crunch though. Sharing her with someone else, even someone he trusted and cared about.

"Baby, you want to come up here and make out with Eliot while I," Hardison found he was shy about actually talking dirty with someone else in the bed. He made a gesture indicating what he wanted to do.

"Ooh, yes please!" Parker said, flipping herself over so that she was right way around and between Eliot and Hardison. She reached for Eliot, who leaned in easily to start kissing her. 

Hardison's stomach gave a wriggle at that, but no, he was okay with that, that was actually fine, it turned out. It was sweet, really. He expected to feel more jealousy, but this was Eliot.

Hardison scooted down to kneel between Parker's legs and ran his hand down over her mons to delicately part her lips. He couldn't wait to taste her arousal. Parker hadn't always been totally relaxed about sex. It took a while for her to feel safe and comfortable letting someone touch her like that, but it warmed something in Hardison to see her open up, to let him touch her, to even feel safe enough to suggest letting Eliot into this. She was so brave and strong.

Parker thrust her hips up suggestively at Hardison and he leaned down, drawing his tongue down over her clitoris and swirling it around. He heard her moan into Eliot's mouth, and heard a corresponding sound of pleasure from Eliot. That was new. 

Parker tasted so good, sweet and tart and musky. Hardison loved burying his face in the folds of her pussy, sliding a finger into her vagina to tease at her g-spot while he used his tongue to drive her crazy. She was pretty clear about what she wanted, moving under him to push herself into his mouth and fingers just how she liked.

He felt the bed move and looked up to see Parker moving Eliot around so that he was kneeling and leaning down over her while they made out and she could reach his dick and start working it with her hand. 

Woah. Eliot's dick in Parker's hand was - Hardison bit his lip, holding back a sound of his own. That shouldn't be such a turn on, but damn. He wondered what she'd look like with her lips around Eliot. He still wasn't sure how he felt, but it could be incredible.

"Why'd you stop?" Parker surfaced from kissing Eliot to complain, reaching down to push Hardison's head back where she wanted it.

"Sorry baby," Hardison said. He went back to pleasing her. He loved it when she'd get bossy like that and put her hands on him to put him where she wanted. He was the man with the skills to make her arch her back and moan and let out breathy little cusswords that she rarely used otherwise. 

Soon, Parker was pressing up against Hardison with urgency, rocking her hips against his hand as he fingered her, giving all the little sighs and sounds that he knew meant she was close to coming. He glanced up, and she had her head thrown back. She was still stroking Eliot's cock, and Eliot was kissing her breasts, one of his hands cupping her right breast. She was so near gone, and Hardison took her right over the edge. He heard Eliot catching his breath with a deep groan. Oh yeah, when Parker came, if she had any part of her body on or near your penis, you felt it. He hoped Eliot liked things a bit on the rough side.

Hardison sat up and wiped his hand across his mouth. 

"Oh, god, that was the best!" Parker gasped. She beckoned Hardison to come up and lie next to her, and kissed him.

She turned to Eliot. "He makes me feel like I'm falling. I like it like that, I like feeling free."

"I know, sweetheart." Eliot said, smiling and leaning in to kiss Parker softly. "Don't worry, we won't let you down. We got you."

"That's sweet. You're sweet. Can I suck you? I want to suck you." Parker said, looking at Eliot. He looked over at Hardison.

"That okay with you, Hardison? I'm clean, but we can use a rubber."

"Uh, yeah, sure, man. We probably should have, we didn't talk about it, but we got all our tests done, me and Parker, everything's good, it's all good." He paused to think about it, think about what would happen next and how he'd feel. "But I'd like if you use a condom."

Parker made a face. "Bleh! Condoms don't taste as good."

"Sweetheart, it'll still be good." Eliot said with a smirk. "Especially if Hardison's fucking you at the same time."

"You have the best plans!" Parker said, her face lighting up again, her previous distaste forgotten in an instant.

"Yeah, I like the sound of that," Hardison said, "gimme some sugar, baby."

Eliot shot him a disbelieving look for that line, but Hardison knew he was cool. Parker always liked his style.

Parker in bed was no different from Parker anywhere else. Which is to say, she could be an unpredictable pest, usually for her own amusement. She stretched over Eliot to reach for a condom from the bedside table, and rolled it down onto him quickly, but that was the last thing she did efficiently for a while.

Hardison lined up behind his girl, who was kneeling side-on to Eliot, and put his hands on her slim hips, stroking across the small of her back with his thumbs. His cock was hard and dripping with pre-cum, but he didn't plunge straight into her, instead teasing her opening with the head. She liked to set the pace, and the brush of her wetness against him was intoxicating, so he wasn't in any hurry.

Eliot, on the other hand. Hardison grinned as he watched Parker at work, her pink tongue darting out to barely tease the head of Eliot's dick. 

"Does that feel good? How about that?" she teased and played, never settling into a rhythm.

Eliot's eyes would squeeze shut briefly when she licked him, and his forearms tensed as he braced against the mattress.

Hardison knew that little trick of hers. It was enough to drive a man insane, just little flick, flick, flicks of electric pleasure.

Eliot lasted less time than Hardison expected before he growled, "Come on!" at Parker, his face tight with arousal and frustration.

Parker giggled and then leaned forward and swallowed down half the length of Eliot's cock in one motion. At the same time, she wriggled her hips back, pushing herself onto Hardison. He braced his cock with a hand to help her out. Parker hadn't had a lot of experience when they'd got together. Sometimes Hardison felt like she deserved someone cleaner, with less of a dirty mind. But it wasn't like he'd exactly had a lot of sex before he was with her. He had a whole lot of theoretical knowledge, and they were working it out as they went along.

She seemed to be flat out loving having two men to play with. Not that Hardison was complaining, not that he could find voice to say much more than, "Oh, fuck, yes." right now as she moved on him. But he'd never even imagined he could be in a threesome, and she didn't seem to realize it wasn't a routine occurrence. 

The look on Eliot's face now was so open, his lips parted slightly and his eyes glazed. He was touching Parker's head, not holding her down. Hardison would have stopped things right then if Eliot took advantage, but no, he was touching her reverently, gently, his big hands running through her hair like she was made of the finest porcelain and silk, and he looked so young. It was like looking at a different Eliot. Hardison wasn't sure what he'd expected; something smugger or more knowing. Not this look like he didn't want to break something or lose something precious.

Parker was making little mewling noises around Eliot's cock. She had her own thing going on. Hardison felt like shaking it up a bit. He knew how she liked to be touched, how she would just lose it for the rasp of a fingernail over one of her nipples, for the gentle drag of his hand down the back of her neck, scratching down past her shoulder blades, tracing her spine and giving a little dig of fingernails over the dimples at the small of her back. His touches were rewarded with shudders and shivers, breaking Parker's rhythm and adding a delicious unpredictability to her movements. Her mewling turned to outright moans as he leaned down to nip at the side of her neck just where it met her shoulders.

He could see from that angle that she was working Eliot's balls with one hand, her other hand on the bed supporting her. As he bit and nipped, she gave a squeeze that was apparently enough to make Eliot buck up a bit off the bed and gasp out. He was being pretty quiet, but once he let loose with the gasp, the dam was broken.

"Oh, yeah, darlin', like that, just like that" he gasped out, his country accent coming through even more than usual. "Please, yeah, oh, yeah. Parker, sweetheart, just... oh..."

It was kind of funny, totally weird, and actually pretty hot to see Eliot like this. Here he was, his usual cool, taciturn manner completely discomposed as he he came apart, coming with a sharp cry of pleasure.

Parker pulled her lips off Eliot's cock with a pop.

"Roll over now," she said over her shoulder to Hardison, sliding off him to let him move. "I want to ride you!"

Hardison almost always let Parker do the driving in bed once they got going. She knew what she wanted. It all felt good to him, and given her lack of experience, he'd rather she chose how she wanted things to go.

That and his dick really seemed to like her bossy voice, which was a path of thinking he was in no way ready to wander any further down during his first, 'can't believe this is real', threesome.

He rolled onto his back, and Parker straddled him, lowering herself down to fuck herself on his cock. He put his hands around her waist to support her, feeling her strong muscles work under his hands as she rocked herself up and down.

She finished herself on him, gasping, moaning his name over and over. Eliot stirred from his sex-dazed state to prop himself on one elbow and watch with a lazy smirk.

It was intense, being watched like that, and Hardison couldn't stop from meeting Parker's movement with hard thrusts of his hips. With Parker riding him like that it wasn't long before he was coming too, gone on the sheer crashing overload of pleasure.

Parker rolled off and squished herself between the two men, leaning over to kiss Hardison, then Eliot. She was up and moving again before Hardison had recovered any composure at all. He was used to this by now. Parker got zingy and bouncy and restless and didn't want to be touched after sex. She was back in less than a minute with a washcloth and cleaned up a startled looking Eliot, palming the condom off him and into the cloth with her usual sleight of hand. She gave Hardison a wipe-down too. 

"I'm going to go shower, and then Alice has book club, yay!" Parker said.

"You are Alice!" Eliot and Hardison said in synch.

"Right. I'm Alice. Alice is going to go and do normal people things now. You cuddle. Eliot, Hardison is a cuddler. He always wants to cuddle." She wrinkled her nose. "I don't do that. You do it for me."

"Somethin' wrong with her." Eliot said as he rolled over and more or less bundled Hardison into his arms. Hardison froze up.

"This okay?" Eliot said.

"Uh, sure man. If you're good with it." Hardison said. Eliot's skin was warm and his hands were big and rough. Of course he was the big spoon.

They were quiet for a while, but Hardison's dozy post-orgasmic state was gone. Parker's easy order for Eliot to cuddle, and Eliot's easy acquiescence were making him feel edgy and weird.

"You sure you're okay, man?" Eliot said.

"I'm fine. This is fine." Hardison said. "If it's fine with you, it's fine with me, bro, I mean."

"Then why're you all tensed up?"

"Just never thought you'd be a cuddler."

"Lot of things you don't know about me." Eliot said. He sounded amused.

Hardison tried to shut up and enjoy actually getting a post-sex snuggle for once. Parker didn't do that, and he did feel a sort of emptiness when she just got up and he was suddenly all touch starved. But he couldn't shake his wariness. Eliot hadn't really touched him at all during their threesome. It was just Parker in the middle. Which made Hardison figure that Parker must have been wrong about Eliot being interested in him, or in men at all.

But having seen Eliot look so young, so at peace while he was touching Parker, could Hardison snatch that away just because Eliot wasn't into him, too? He did love Eliot, like family, only not like a brother or anything, because you do not check out your brother's fine ass. And he loved Parker like she was his soul. So he couldn't stand between them if being together made them both so happy. Just as long as he didn't have to give up Parker altogether.

"Listen, man." he said, breaking the twitchy silence. Well, his silence was twitchy. Eliot's was calm, but waiting.

"If you and Parker, if you want to be with her, I can deal. Or I can try, anyway."

Hardison felt Eliot tense behind him. He heard him exhale slowly, deliberately, like he was counting in his head.

"Hardison," he said, and then paused as if trying to compose his thoughts. "Did you want this?"

"I, yeah, I did. Parker suggested it, but it's not like being with you is a hardship," Hardison said. He worked up the confidence to finish his thought. "But it's okay if you're not into having me in the arrangement. I can be okay with that. Gonna take me a bit, but ...I love Parker and ...it's okay if you don't want me. I mean, yeah, you're hot, and ... it was her idea..."

He swallowed down the thought about just how desolate it would feel if he knew the other two were fucking, were making love without him. But Parker would still want him, yeah? She'd said so, and she didn't lie to him.

Without warning, Eliot rolled Hardison onto his back and was leaning over him, arms braced on either side, his face close to Hardison's. His expression was terrifyingly serious. Hardison didn't have a clue what he'd done wrong.

"Uh, I'm sorry, didn't mean to freak you out by saying you were hot, I can keep my hands to myself, we can just pretend this whole thing didn't-" Hardison babbled. Great, _now_ Eliot was mad at him for - for what? For being bi or whatever? For whatever it was straight dudes were threatened by when they thought a gay guy was checking them out? He could feel his heart racing.

"Shut up." Eliot said through gritted teeth. "Shut up _now._ "

Hardison snapped his mouth shut.

"You didn't- the whole time you didn't _touch_ me, just Parker. So I was bein' careful. But you just get this straight. You don't ever, ever have to have sex with someone you ain't sure about. You don't _ever_ have to do anything you don't want to, not even because Parker really wants it and you want to give her the damn moon and the stars." His full lower lip quivered with an emotion that Hardison couldn't read. Anger? Pain? That look in Eliot's eyes was the same one he got when he hadn't done his job, as he saw it, and someone else on the team got hurt.

"Fuck's sake, Hardison. I wouldn't have said yes to comin' to bed with the two of you if I didn't want both of you. And _anyone_ tries to talk you into doing something you don't want, I'll -" 

Eliot rolled off Hardison, onto his back, throwing his arm over his face.

"That girl ain't right." he gritted out. "I shoulda asked more questions, I shoulda known she wasn't playing with a full deck. But dammit, Hardison, I'm only human, and she - it's not somethin' I ever expected- she offered me everything I coulda wanted. She offered me both of you. Even if I just got one night."

"You. Me?" Hardison squeaked, aware that his voice was not coming out in a dignified register.

"You, moron." Eliot said. "So looks like we fucked this one up good. You ever been in a threesome before?"

"I'm a geek, Eliot. What do you think?"

"You been with a man before?"

Hardison didn't really want to admit to just how completely inexperienced he was, or how confused he was, but this was Eliot lying beside him and talking about feelings.

"Nah." he said quietly.

"Fuck." Eliot said, rolling onto his side and looking at Hardison.

"I, uh, thought about it, but I've never, I mean girls are real nice, and for a long time I thought all the other stuff with liking guys was wrong, because of how I grew up, who I grew up with around me. I got over thinking that, but by then, well, girls were easier, and it wasn't like I was even that great at dating _them_ , so I guess I just pushed it all out of the way."

"Can I touch you?" Eliot asked.

Hardison nodded and rolled to face Eliot. The look on Eliot's face was softer than usual and when he reached out to pull Hardison in close, his grip was light, not like the gruff half-hugs he occasionally deigned to give Hardison.

It took some rearranging to solve the too-many-arms problem. Eliot's arms were like tree-trunks. Hardison ended up tucked up into Eliot's chest, and he tried hard not to think about being in the girly position. It was way different from having Parker in the bed. She was a handful of air and lightning. Eliot was rock solid, all hard, flat planes. Good thing the bed was big.

And then there was the not terribly small matter of being able to feel Eliot's soft cock pressed against his leg. Which was different and all of Hardison's brain seemed to want to focus on that sensation. He took a breath, calming himself. This was Eliot, Eliot wasn't freaking out about Hardison being naked, and Hardison could get a hold of himself and get used to this.

"So, uh, you've been with a man before then?" Hardison asked.

"Some." Eliot said. "Moreau had some wild parties. Didn't mean anything, but didn't mean it didn't feel good."

"You didn't actually sleep with Damien Moreau?" Hardison said.

"Hell NO." Eliot said. "But in the middle of all that, I was pretty far gone down a real bad road, and I knew it. Those parties, at least I didn't have to be in my head all the time. Didn't much care who's mouth was on my dick. I'm not a good guy, Hardison."

"We all did things we wish we hadn't." Hardison said. "Who you had sex with probably shouldn't be one of them. So you're, what, bisexual?"

"Does it matter? Hardison, do I look like I sit around worryin' about what label I should choose?" Eliot growled.

"I suppose not. I guess since Parker brought up the whole threesome thing I've been thinking about it. It's a lot to figure out."

"Way I see it, you and me and Parker, we got each other's backs and we want each other." There was a wistful note to Eliot's voice that Hardison couldn't put his finger on, but Eliot wasn't finished talking.

"You want to worry about what that makes you, that's up to you."

Hardison sighed. It figured that Eliot would not be massively helpful on the theory side of things. Parker wouldn't be either. And like hell he was going to talk to Nate about it, so it'd have to be Sophie. Some time.

Eliot shifted around, his hands moving over Hardison's back.

"We talk it out enough?" he said. "Because there are better things to do in bed than talk, if we're good."

"We're good." Hardison said. "But, uh, what did you have in mind?" 

He wasn't sure what he'd say if Eliot wanted to go all the way. He was pretty sure he wasn't ready for that. It seemed like Eliot would be okay with hearing 'no'. In fact, it seemed like Eliot would rather hear 'no' than have Hardison fumble through something that scared him for the sake of bravado. Unless it involved being thrown off a building. Eliot and Parker were experts at ignoring Hardison saying 'no' to being thrown off buildings.

Eliot chuckled. "Nothin' too fancy," he said.

He really was different in bed, different when he was all relaxed and warm like this. It was overwhelmingly sexy to be with him like this, feel that laugh rumble through his chest where it was pressed to Hardison. Although, in the right circumstances, it could be hot to hear him growl. Hardison's cock twitched at the thought.

It was even more overwhelmingly sexy when Eliot slid down, his hand running over Hardison's skin, warm, rough, and then one hand wrapping around Hardison's cock which was already coming to attention.

"You went down on Parker, she went down on you. How bout I square things up?"

The mathematical part of Hardison's brain wanted to point out that it was definitely more of a triangle. The mathematical part of Hardison's brain was melted away into a pool of "Oh holy ... yes." when Eliot's tongue touched the head of his hardening cock. 

"Ohgod yes," he said. "Yes, please, yeah, that would be a great idea."

Eliot hummed, a soft buzz of sensation that made Hardison's hips jolt up. Eliot pressed Hardison to the bed with one firm hand over his left hip, fingers tracing the crease between his hip and his thigh. Hardison swallowed. Woah, well, nothing with Parker felt quite like that. She was strong but Eliot was just effortless in the way he stilled Hardison's motion. It was a good thing, because the next thing Eliot did was to take Hardison's cock all the way into his mouth.

Hardison made a sound that he would have been reluctant to describe as a whimper. Shit, that felt amazing. Eliot's full lips were like velvet and Hardison would have bucked up into his mouth if it weren't for that one strong, warm hand keeping him in place.

Eliot didn't bother teasing. He just set to a shattering pace, the hand that wasn't holding Hardison's hip down working the base of his shaft. He wasn't taking Hardison all the way down, but the combination of his mouth, sly tongue teasing and swirling every time he bobbed up, and his hand matching the pace exactly, were enough to send all coherent thought fleeing from Hardison's mind to be replaced by nothing but the sensations of "yes," "more," "now."

Hardison wished he could touch, wished he could close the circuit and feel something, feel some tactile input to diffuse the almost too much sensation just to his cock that he was getting right now. Eliot obviously had more experience at this than Parker. Apparently he hadn't just been getting his cock sucked at Moreau's parties. The things he knew were going to blow the top of Hardison's head off soon if he couldn't do something, touch something.

"Please, Eliot. I want to, I need."

"What?" Eliot said, lifting his head and sweeping his hair away from his face."

"I..." Hardison was hesitant, but he knew what he wanted. "I want to touch you."

Eliot made a low rumbling sound that Hardison took for approval. "Where d'you want me?" he said, his voice low and smoky.

Hardison thought about logistics. Sure, Eliot's mouth on his cock felt incredible, but he wanted skin to skin, the sizzle of contact, for Eliot to stop being such a gentleman and just move.

"Come up here." Hardison said, his voice coming out breathier than usual. "Just -" he used his hands to guide Eliot, pulling him up so that Eliot was lying over him, using his arm to hold himself up. That way Hardison could explore, at first tentatively, and then more surely, Eliot's gorgeous body.

He reached out and ran his hand down Eliot's abs. Damn. The electricity sparked and surged for him as he was getting to touch and feel a dizzying feedback loop, his fingers running over taut muscle, clean lines interrupted by a snarl of scar tissue here and there. This was - it was like having his hands on the codebase of Blue Gene, like reaching out and touching the system architecture of the biggest massively parallel supercomputer. 

It was Eliot, his best friend, and the man who defined the poetry of motion. He'd expected something rougher in bed. Eliot was clutching Hardison's hip again with that hot, firm grip, holding him right where he wanted him. But aside from that, he hadn't been pushy or aggressive at all. He was letting Hardison figure things out for himself. Like running his hand down Eliot's hint of a treasure trail to wrap his fingers around Eliot's cock.

Eliot moaned and thrust into Hardison's hand, a little snap of his hips. Eliot's cock was longer than Hardison's, not as thick, but still a heavy handful. It felt strange to have his hand on another man's dick, but the response from Eliot to his touch was perfect, was beautiful. He thumbed across the head of Eliot's cock, which was slick with pre-cum. That was different to feel on someone else, and he hesitated a moment. But it was fine, it was just like jerking himself off, nothing to get freaked out by.

Hardison knew what _he_ liked, and he started with that, a slightly loose grip that ran from the root of Eliot's cock right up over the head, a little twist as he finished the upstroke. That got a gratifying gasp out of Eliot. Hardison took a shaky breath. 

Even with his long hair veiling Eliot's slyly amused eyes, Hardison could read pleasure and self-satisfaction on Eliot's face. Eliot leaned down onto his elbow so that he could brush his hand down Hardison's face, cupping his chin so that Eliot could kiss Hardison with a passionate possessiveness.

"Can't believe I get to do this." he murmured, tracing Hardison's jaw with his lips. Hardison tilted his head back, and Eliot scraped his teeth down Hardison's neck. 

Hardison moaned. He loved when Parker did that, all sharp little bites. This wasn't the same, but it hit the same nerve endings, firing messages of pleasure-pain-pleasure-pain that tingled over his skin.

Eliot pressed his hips down and slid his hand between them to grab Hardison's cock. That was it, the whole deal, even better than Eliot's ungodly talented mouth, just to be touched, to be able to touch, to have Eliot's warm weight, so different from Parker, so strong in different ways from her lean gymnast's body, pressed against him while they moved, Hardison thrusting up to meet Eliot.

"Here," he said, "like this." The words rumbled against the pulse in Hardison's neck. Eliot lined his cock up with Hardison's, guiding Hardison's hand so that there was a glide of silky skin on skin. 

Even though he was working on his second coming, it didn't take long to for Hardison to feel the beginnings of that soaring bliss, the heat of it rooted right under the base of his cock, pulsing through him so strongly so that he could only cry out and throw his head back, eyes fluttering closed as he came, semen spurting out over his hand and Eliot's, and splashing on the skin of his torso. Eliot didn't seem to care, just used the extra lubrication to keep stroking himself, riding through Hardison's orgasm. Hardison was almost over-sensitized, and he was relieved when Eliot's hand moved just to stroking his own cock, Eliot biting down on Hardison's shoulder and thrashing against him as he came not long after Hardison. He seemed content to stay where he was, slumped heavily on top of Hardison. Hardison shrugged his arm into position over Eliot's back, and succumbed to the manly art of falling asleep right after sex.

 

\---  
A few weeks later, on another job, Parker and Hardison were dangling from the side of a skyscraper. Hardison figured Nate knew exactly how much Hardison hated heights, and took a certain pleasure into building that into their plans. 

Before they could reach the window they were supposed to be entering through, Parker stopped rappelling. Hardison caught himself a few feet down from her, and she gracefully lowered herself to the same level. She popped her com out of her ear.

Taking one extremely shaky hand off the rope, Hardison matched her movement. His girl wanted to have a private conversation while hanging off the side of the building, who was he to argue?

"He's still chasing after other people." Parker said with a pout, shouting slightly to be heard over the high wind that was gusting around Hardison in a terrifying manner.

"Eliot?" Hardison yelled back. The hitter had been to bed with them a few times since the first time, and seemed to enjoy getting kisses after jobs well done, but he was definitely still on the prowl whenever the job involved a pretty damsel in distress.

"He's supposed to just want us now!" Parker insisted. If she could have stamped her feet in thin air, she looked like she would have.

"We're growing on him baby girl. He just - he's still looking for something normal, I guess."

"You told me that normal is whatever works for us." Parker said, her expression steely.

"It is, baby, it is. But Eliot's gotta get used to the idea that he can have us, more than just for sex. We'll get there."

Parker nodded, a gleam in her eye, her hand back on the mechanism to let her drop down the side of the building at alarming speed. "We will. Let's go steal a hitter!"

**Author's Note:**

> PSA: Kids, in spite of what George Michael said, sex can be fantastic even when it's not one on one. But it really helps to talk. You can avoid the awkwardness of suddenly wondering if you're allowed to/encouraged to touch or kiss someone by actually having that discussion before getting naked. Enthusiastic consent is important whether there are two of you or more of you! "Not no" is not the same thing as "yes!" Sure, everyone in the story did say yes before the rumpus began, but it would have been really awesome all round if they'd sat down for five minutes and confirmed who was okay to do what with whom, and established some boundaries.
> 
> Also, this is fiction, but sadly, half-assing safer sex practices doesn't just happen in stories. Watch where you're putting those fluids, be informed about risks, and again, talk about this stuff before everyone's all sweaty and endorphined up.
> 
> I tried to be sensitive about identity and orientation. Some men who have sex with men never end up identifying as other than straight. Eliot's headspace on this was eluding me; does he really not care, or is he still having a bit of a repressed moment? I'm sure between Parker's general enthusiasm and Alec's mad google skillz they'll get it all figure out and be marching in Portland Pride within a couple of years.


End file.
